Sunday, April 12, 2009

What Would Jesus Do?

I was leaving work on Thursday when I noticed a man standing at the main floor empty information desk looking like he needed help.   My first thought was, "Why is Jesus standing at the information desk, doesn't he already know everything?" and my second thought was, "Why is Jesus wearing a sweatshirt and pajama pants?"   This guy really did look like Jesus:  long hair - check! beard - check! sandals - check!  Come to find out, this guy - we'll call him Steve -  (because that's his name) was sitting in his car waiting for his wife to come out of a meeting when he witnessed a hit and run in the parking lot.  He said a woman backed out of her spot into another car, then she and her passenger got out to assess the damage.  The driver looked at Steve in his car, shrugged her shoulders and said, "Sorry", got back in her car and drove away.   Wow.  That either takes a lot of balls or not a lot of brains.  Steve got her license plate number as she left the lot, then came in for assistance.  The car that was damaged had a campus parking tag, so I thought we could just call Parking Services, they would look the tag number up, call this person's office so they could come down and get the info. Of course, nothing with the campus is that easy to deal with.  They couldn't release the owner's info to me, which I was in complete agreement with, but they wouldn't contact him either.  They told me I had to call Campus Police and the police would gather all the info.  Several years ago, I had a Christmas Eve incident at Lafayette Square Mall where I think Jesus was testing me and I failed.  In that I don't know how many more chances you get, I've since pushed a somewhat dicey looking fellow in his wheelchair across Illinois Street in downtown Indianapolis during Robin's 13th birthday celebration, walked multiple lost patients through the hospital and across campus, and that's why I proceeded to wait the next 45 minutes with Steve for the police to show up.  During the course of those 45 minutes, I discovered that:
  • Steve was an English major, and had spent the past several years living in Mexico teaching English.  Sounds like something Jesus would do. 
  • Steve is teaching an ethics class on campus.  Uh, I think Jesus knows a thing or two about ethics.
  • Steve wants to teach philosophy to college students when he gets his Masters degree.  Jesus-Philosophy...need I say more?
It's a good thing I stayed:  the dispatcher called my cell phone twice because the po-po couldn't figure out what building we were at. Sigh....  When they did arrive, Steve and I parted on a handshake and said it was really nice to meet each other.  

I think it's kind of cool that this one time I can honestly say I know WWJD.  If He sees you hit a car and take off, He'll turn your a$$ in!


10 comments:

Boozy Tooth said...

GO JESUS!

And on this beautiful Easter morning, let me be the first to wish you a blessed Easter.

I love you Becky. Keep the bloggy awesomeness coming. LOVE your posts and love your comments on my blog. Always hilarious.

Hank said...

Okay.....this is all great (stooopid campus police! gee-yawd!), but I think the best part is you pushing the dicey-looking fellow in his wheelchair across Illinois St.!!!

How do you find these people????

Sarah K said...

it's true! you NEVER know who you are talking to! but i don't always remember that....

farmer said...

haha that made me chuckle

marta said...

I saw your Jim Gaffigan comment on cakewrecks and had to visit your blog! I love me some Jim Gaffigan! Hmm.. note to self: check birthday on song chart site.

The Courteous Chihuahua said...

I have tix to see him at The Murat on May 15 - wooooooooot!!!!

The Courteous Chihuahua said...

Farmer! You're back!

Alison said...

Jesus is appearing at the Murat? And he's CHARGING???

Oh...you meant that other guy. Never mind.

Hey, I wanted to answer your cockscomb question. And the answer is: I don't know; I've never grown cockscomb. But I googled it, and found a site that said plant the seeds indoors 6 to 8 weeks before the last frost. Whatever.

If you have enough, plant some of them indoors now, and the rest directly outside when it's done frosting. It'll be an experiment, see?

And then you can write a post about how to grow cockscomb from seed! Instant internet expertise.

The Courteous Chihuahua said...

Oh, Flartus...You crack me up! I am NOT ready to go see Jesus just yet.

Cary McNeal said...

Don't f*ck with The Jesus.